The Best/Worst/Most Exciting/Scary Weekend I've Ever Had

As you can probably guess from the title. My weekend was interesting to say the least.
So much happened in two days I don't know where to start. I'll give it a shot tho'. This is a long one...TRUST.

Saturday

My girl Tessa (pictured here) was eager to go out to a club, so we went to the mall to pick her out something fly. I didn't want anything cause I had no intention of going. I was not feeling it. She kept begging and pleading and I finally said okay I will kick it for a minute with ya. She was excited. So we stopped by my place so I could get changed.

Then we headed up North to her boyfriend's house. We're driving along Lakeshore Drive at 100+ miles an hour in a red 2006 Mustang when all of a sudden a Impala starts to inch over into the lane we are flying in. And when I say inch over I do mean inch over. I've never seen anyone switch lanes so slow. Anyway, Tessa didn't stop she just moved over as the Impala got so close I could've put lip stick on the elderly lady who was driving. The lady continued to come over into our lane almost grinding us into the side railing. Tessa honked non-stop. The old lady obviously didn't see us but heard the honking and got back in her lane. That lady was "drifting one a memory" cause she was in another world thank God she didn't hit us, cause we were going to fast. That's incident one.

Tessa starts drinking once we get to her boyfriend's house. She wanted to start the party before we went to the club. Cool. I'm not really a drinker so I just had some Bacardi and coke, which I didn't finish cause I had a feeling I needed to be on point. We get her boyfriend to take us to the Ice Bar...womp, womp. As we pulled up I said, "I don't like the looks of this joint." Tessa tipsy says, "Awe come on Millie." So I go ahead, I'll try not to be a party pooper. We call this nigga we work with, he is the one who invited us or shall I say her. I'm extra baggage...lol
Prior to all this we called dude we work with who shall now be called "Mr. Puss Ass" and asked him what was the cover. He tells us there isn't one for ladies tonight. Cool.

We get to the door and the bouncers are eying Tessa. Talking bout what they would do to her all loud and shit. I'm getting pissed because it is totally disrespectful, she doesn't notice cause she is drunk. So now I feel like I'm her handler or cock blocker and I didn't want that role I'm just trying to kick it. But I hate to hear men speak to women in a vulgar manner. So I'm getting pissed. Tessa is grown but to me she is still a kid and these niggas were old, some more puss ass niggas to add to the bunch. We get past them fools only to find out ladies don't get in free. Its 15bux well my dumb ass didn't bring no cash. I figured I'd just charge whatever I wanted. Okay fine I asked if there was an ATM around they said yeah right next door. Cool. As we are about to leave out "Mr. Puss Ass" says, nah cuz we got ya'll c'mon back in. Cool. He hands dude some money but what do you know he was on some slick shit. It wasn't enough cash and dude figured it out. He was like nah ya'll got to pay up or we getting the bouncers. I'm like great, let's just go to the ATM Tessa damn...they on some bullshit, they ain't go pay for us.

So I drag her drunk ass out to the ATM. Now she's pissed and her Puerto Rican side rears its ugly head...lol. She gets to cussing and talking about how she ain't never paid to get into shit and yadda, yadda, yadda. I tell her that gray eyed I'm pretty shit ain't working tonight muthafucka....lol...let's go. We get the cash and try to head back in, one of the bouncers point to the back of the line. I was like whatever, the a nice chick who was standing in line with her girls was like ya'll can get in front of us, we saw what happened. I was like cool thank you, but the bouncer was like, "Nah they have to get to the back." Let me tell you the line wasn't even long ya'll. It was like 6 people out there and 4 of them was with old girl who said we could get in front of them. So the nigga was trying to fuck with us. I turned to Tessa and said, "I'm ready to go."

She finally gets it and we catch a cab. She says, "Millie, there is another spot I always go to I promise we will get in for free." I'm like Tessa I've had enough. She's like trust me. Okay. That's incident two.

We go to this place on Halstead called "Redno" they have a $50 cover. But what do you know Tessa knows these muthafuckers, we get in for free. It's a mostly white and Arab club but they playing the hits which throws me off. I didn't hear any whitey music all night. They were juking. I still wasn't happy tho' I was fucked up about what happened earlier. Tessa started drinking some more and made a friend this chick that works there name Kenya. This chick was cool as hell ya'll and had me rolling (not on X) the entire night. We were cracking up laughing at whitey dancing off bet. Come to find out she is from the westside like me and that's when we really started tripping out. She saved my night. We laughed at Tessa's half black, half Puerto Rican dancing...sometimes she was on beat and sometimes she was off beat...lol But it was funny and I had a good time finally.

That was just Saturday. Sunday had its own crazy/happy moments. I'm gonna get to that in a minute. I'm gonna take a break. Then I'll finish this crazy weekend up.

I Love My Job!

We just had a "ghetto fabulous" block party in the middle of downtown Chicago. It appears that the company I work for thrives on getting its employees drunk.
Let me tell you how these white folks get down.

They took over the lobby and the sidewalks all around the building.
They had 8 bartenders serving all types of alcoholic beverages, beers, Hennessey, and for those who know my company Jack Daniels was definitely in the house among many others
They had coconut shrimp, little garlic bread sandwiches, little fancy pizzas, Garrett's popcorn, and to top it off Chicago's finest Vienna Hot Dogs. What a fucking mix. The menu made no sense but I loved it.
The DJ was bumping. I was looking around like, "These white people really know how to get down."

To say the least I maxed (ate good) drank, and danced. I can't wait for the next "happy hour" in September.
It was a good time in the mad real world.

Heavenly Father

I have the Devil in me....don't laugh its true. I need some serious help over here.
I took advantage of my young hopelessly sprung on Name ex-boyfriend. I ought to be 'shamed and I am.

I had a really bad day at work yesterday. It was full of Name do this, Name do that, Name could you, Name would you...etc. Well when I got home I figured I needed a little stress relief. If you know what I mean...If you don't know what I mean...I"M TALKIN" BOUT SEX NEGRO!!! Sorry, I feel a little Dave Chappelle ish. Anywho I called up my ex cause I knew he would do what I asked with the least hesitation.

I USED THIS POOR BOY...I say boy because he is younger than me...did I mention that before...I think I did...Anywho, I was telling that boy everything and anything he wanted to hear just as long as he didn't stop strokin'... and lickin'...and...Ummm my bad....THAT IS SO BAD!!!

I just wanted to blow off a little steam and get rid of a little stress not get back into a relationship that was all wrong for me, but the boy can lay that pipe...ya mean? Sorry. See I need an intervention, I'm so out of control. I would throw myself on the alter but that would be pointless because the next day I would be at it again. So I figure don't front if you truly ain't ready to change.

I'm livin' foul ya'll...BUT IT FEELS SO DAMN GOOD.

I'm just being selfish. I'm not even considering his feelings. I don't want to hurt the poor boy. But I know I am cause I'm not all in love with him. I just wanted some dick!! ARrrrghh!!!

It's official, I'm outta control in the mad real world.

Let Me Tell You What An Old Nigga Told Me

I was talking to one of my ex-beaus the other day and this negro had the nerve to say that I have an unusually high sex drive. I was like, "Yeah right, whatever man!" I totally disagree. He claims that if a man is working and not living with you then you should only expect sex once a week.

I was totally shocked to hear that number. Once a week! I'm sorry but I need it a little more often than once a week. But now that I think about it there has only been one guy who was able to keep up with me and he is younger than me. I tend to only get it once a week, hell if that, from the negro I'm dealing with now and that is some bullshit. I want more damn it!

Gotdamn I'm spilling the beans today...oh well...

Anyway last night I was with old boy chillin' at my crib. I let him hit cause he's good at it but like 20 minutes later I wanted to go again.

(He and I went to the Taste of Chicago yesterday and I was so aggravated by him. He was just talking and talking and I totally wasn't listening to a word he was saying. That's weird for me because I'm usually a great listener...anywho)

Do you know this negro had the nerve to tell me, "I'm tired it's been a rough week." I was like WHAT!?! How old are you man? (24) C'mon you got to be shittin' me you can't go again...AHHH I HATE YOU! I didn't say that but that's what I was thinking. The man fell asleep in my bed all huddled next to my boobs like a newborn. I let him sleep for an hour...he was lucky I was watching Austin Powers. Then I was like man its time to go...if you ain't giving it up you gots to get out of my bed, hell I might as well go to sleep too. I'm the one who has to be at work at the crack of dawn. He doesn't have to be in until 10 womp womp.

I'm getting mad just thinking about that shit....

The original point to this post was to ask if having sex 3 times a week was a lot to ask from a man who is working and doesn't live with you? Hell I think it's just good business...lol

I wonder what the "Have You Ever" nigga would say in the mad real.